Back to Ipswich
by PNLu
Summary: Kasey has a secret and needs to heal. Her parents send her back to Ipswich to live with her Grandmother and spend time with the boys she grew up with, but she doesn't know everything about them either. Can they help her move on? Reid/OC
1. Reasons to Leave

**This is my first fanfic, but I hope it's enjoyable nonetheless. Please review (and be kind where possible). **

**This is a long chapter as I'm introducing my OC and her background, please excuse the length – later chapters should be shorter.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Covenant or its characters (but I do own my OC). **

It happened one night in summer. His parents were away although it wouldn't have mattered because he was so rich that he had a floor to himself, an apartment, at the age of 17, with his parents living upstairs. He was my closest friend in New York, though he never lived up to the friends in my childhood, the boys I've now heard have earned themselves the nickname "the Sons of Ipswich." Those boys were like my brothers. This boy was someone who made me laugh, who I went to school with, and who didn't mind having me over to play video games on a Saturday night – we were friends, and I felt comfortable around him and for some reason confident that I didn't have to worry about him hitting on me. I was apparently attractive to boys – I'd been asked out by at least six to our school's summer dance, but I wasn't overly preoccupied with dressing up and going out. I didn't mind it, but I was also a bit of a tomboy, of sorts, in that I enjoyed staying at home and playing Gran Turismo on PlayStation when I wasn't studying. His name was Josh. He was obviously skilled in hiding who he really was, and I was an idiot for falling for it.

I came over late in the afternoon and we'd been eating and screaming mock-insults at each other and the television for about five hours. I thought it was probably time to head off as I was getting a headache and my feet were numb from sitting cross-legged. Josh protested but I told him I was tired and that he could play in single-player mode if he was really desperate. I gathered my phone from down the side of the couch, and my iPod from the player on the shelf nearby, and shoved them in my bag, waving goodbye over my head as I walked towards the door. As I pulled the door towards me it slammed shut. I saw Josh's hand to the left of my head, holding the door shut. He reached around my head with his right hand and re-applied the deadbolt.

'What the hell are you doing Josh? I've got to get some sleep, stop fucking around,' I said without turning around to look at him.

'I want you to stay' Josh replied smugly.

'Cool, that's great, but I'm leaving now so you're outta luck,' still not realising that he wasn't joking.

He didn't say anything then. Instead, he shoved me against the door, his front pressed against my back.

'Jesus Christ Josh, what are you doing? You're hurting me you asshole!'

He still didn't say anything. He pinned my hands above my head with his left hand and pushed my hips against the wall with even more force with his right. I knew what he was doing now. I struggled to break free, trying to kick him but I couldn't reach. Every attempt I made was met with absolute force, and I realised with horror just how strong he was. There was nothing I could do. Tears started stinging the corner of my eyes as I tried to comprehend the betrayal of someone I had called my friend but I tried to stay strong, tried again to break free, tried to scream but no one could hear me. I tried to focus on something else. He scraped his fingers down my arms so hard that he left marks. His right hand tore my already loose skirt so that it fell down to my ankles. He ripped what I had on underneath and I tried not to think about what he was doing with his hand. I could feel him underneath his shorts, hard against the back of my thighs. I could feel his body pressed up against me, hear the excitement in his ragged breath. After a while he threw me against a nearby wall, reasserting his strength and my complete helplessness.

He dragged me by my wrists to the guest bedroom nearby and threw me down with such force that I couldn't keep from crying out. Up until then I hadn't made a sound since I'd realised no one could hear me, I didn't want to give him the satisfaction. I was right to do so - I saw the lust in his eyes when he heard my scream. I saw it as he climbed on the bed, climbed on top of me. I spat in his face - it didn't help, it only made him harder. Once again I could feel his weight, this time bearing down on top of me – crushing me. I felt like I was suffocating but could still breathe. He took a condom out of the top draw of the bedside table nearby and ripped it open. This wasn't him acting in the heat of the moment, it was calculated. He knew what he was doing. I don't have to tell you what happened next. It lasted 20 minutes. The longest 20 minutes of my life. He looked me in the eyes and laughed when he was done. I held some solace in the fact that it wasn't my first time. At least he didn't have that. I wasn't overly promiscuous, I just felt ready a few months earlier, and I didn't regret it, it was fine. This wasn't. I looked at him, a mixture of disgust and sadness floating somewhere on my face. I was determined to hold it together until I was outside.

When he was done he said that even if I did ever "feel stupid enough" to tell anyone his parents' lawyers would make it look like I was in fact a sexually promiscuous 17 year old who regretted a decision she'd made. He said the whole school would be laughing at me. He said my parents would look at me and be ashamed. He said it and I believed it. I felt disgusting as I stumbled out of his apartment, tears running silently down my face. I crept into the house when I got home, my mother at work and my father asleep (they had expected me home the next day from a friend's house). I went upstairs and I showered – for an hour. I proceeded to sit there in the cold, wet shower for another hour until I finally peeled myself up off the floor, put on a pair of tracksuit pants and a t-shirt (in the summer) and went to bed. I didn't cry anymore. I didn't sleep, but I didn't cry. I haven't cried since.

But I smoked - sometimes cigarettes because it went someway towards relieving the stress I started to feel on a perpetual basis, but also weed. I found tobacco wasn't mind altering enough to meet my needs. And I drank. To my "friends" I guess it just looked like recreational use, because a lot of them were doing it too (this might seem ridiculous to anybody who didn't spend at least a part of their adolescence in New York because we were 17, but it's definitely not unheard of in the city of Manhattan), but it was more than that for me. Every time I drank I wasn't just escaping from the otherwise "dull" reality of adolescence (which I'm sure to any other age group that doesn't require constant stimulation and excitement seems anything _but _dull), I was escaping the sickening thought of what happened that night. The ultimate betrayal of someone who I thought was my friend. My loss of any feeling of safety, of control. I know this seems ironic, as losing my mind is not a logical step towards regaining control, but the only way I can explain it is: that night was the first time in my life that I felt completely helpless. It was a disgusting feeling. I was thrown out into a storm with absolutely no control over what happened next. By doing drugs I felt like I was throwing _myself _out in to that storm, that feeling was _mine_, not his. But more than that – I wanted to forget. I didn't want rational thought wherein every string of consciousness that wound its way through my head inevitably led to thinking about him, about that night.

I also had sex. Lots of sex. Again, this may seem ironic but I wanted to reclaim something. Our society is completely saturated with sex. I didn't want to think about that night every time someone mentioned the word sex, every time I saw it up on a billboard, every time it appeared in a movie. I didn't want to feel afraid. I was so angry at him for stealing my ability to feel happiness from something that is such a central part of being a human being, a part that we are supposed to be able to lavish in. "FUCK HIM," I told myself, you can't have it... But he could. He still does. It doesn't hurt any less every time those images flash into my head. I don't feel any less afraid. I don't feel any stronger. The people I'm having sex with don't know that, or don't seem to. I put on a brave, seductive face and pretend that I'm enjoying it. I guess on a carnal level I am, but it's not what it should be. It's dirty. It's something to be ashamed of. It's abusive, something I'm inflicting upon myself – punishment for not being smarter in choosing my friends. Punishment for not being strong enough to fight him off.

Please don't mistake me about the drugs and alcohol – I'm not endorsing what I did, or suggesting that I was any cooler for doing it, I'm just telling you it's what I chose. It's what I felt I needed. As for the sex, I have very little judgement when it comes to sex. I grew up in a household that didn't put a huge, red, negative label on sex – just as long as it was safe, and consensual, and you were ready. Especially after that night I have no judgement for people, especially women, who choose to have copious amounts of sex, I just hope they're enjoying it. I think about the fact that everyone has their reasons for doing something. I know they do. And I don't like to label girls. I didn't beforehand, and I certainly don't now. I mentally punch someone every time I hear the word "slut" directed at a girl, whether she's actually having loads of sex or not.

My grades dropped, I guess that was inevitable. With a neurosurgeon for a mother and a college professor in Government and International Relations for a father I wasn't short on fully functioning brain cells so my grades were amongst the top in my year. Yes, I'm sure I killed off a few million of those cells in my attempts to forget, but I think it was mostly the fact that being sober became associated with thinking about _him_, and thinking about him was associated with pain, and pain with depression. So soberness was depression. It wasn't obvious, I'm sure.

My good-heartedly sarcastic sense of humour shielded me from the suspicions of people I spent time with. I'm hesitant to call them my friends because they suffer by comparison. They're nice enough, sure, but they could never compare to the friends from my childhood in Ipswich. Caleb, Tyler, Pogue and Reid (in no particular order) were and are the best friends I have ever had. I left them just before I turned 13 to move to Seattle with my parents, as my mother had accepted an offer at a hospital there. All of them except Tyler had already turned 13 over the previous few months. It was pretty painful leaving the guys behind, and what made it even worse was that when I left we weren't exactly on the best terms. I had been angry with them for leaving me out of things and keeping secrets. I guess I know now that that's just what happens when you become a teenager and the inevitable divide between boys and girls starts to rear its ugly head, but I guess I felt we were close enough to not have to deal with that crap. They apologised and said it was nothing personal, but since we never really had the chance to hang out after that and patch things up, I guess things didn't stay as strong as they could of between us across state lines.

Anyway, after living in Seattle for almost a couple of years we moved to New York. Mum's work in Seattle put her amongst the top neurosurgeons in the States and she was offered an even better job, I guess. I missed Seattle when we left – I love the rain and the city certainly gets its fair share. I'd also made friends but no one I'm still in touch with – after Ipswich I tended to be friends with everyone, but not best friends with anyone. Having said that, how could I not have been excited about moving to New York City? All in all I was expecting New York to be amazing, and it was... for about two and a half years. We moved into an amazing town house just off Bleecker Street in SoHo, and I went to a private school nearby. What I was most excited about was being in the thick of it, being amongst the people and the culture. I wasn't really your typical New York City private school kid – whilst I appreciate the opportunities I've gained from my parent's wealth, I'm also not one to flaunt it, I don't like to be judged on how many material possessions I'm capable of acquiring. The wealth of my parents afforded me the luxury of getting a great education, and I'm thankful for that. However, I found the poorer the kids I hung out with, the more interesting they were – the more stories they had, the more understanding they were. I tried to juggle having friends from all walks of life. Being wealthy and apparently good looking automatically put me in with the popular kids, but the fact that I worked hard and generally preferred black Doc Martins and a flannelette to black stilettos and a Missoni mini (granted, the Docs were probably with a pair of denim short-shorts - I liked fashion, but I wasn't caught up in trends) also gave me an in with the scholarship kids and their friends from around the city. I also preferred their taste in music – more of the Beatles and Radiohead and less of the Pussycat Dolls.

I know I'm generalising about the rich kids, one of the reasons I know this is because I know the Sons of Ipswich, but my experience with Josh only fuelled my prejudice. Josh was from my school. I should have known. He pretended not to care about money, about his gigantic apartment on the Upper East Side, a floor below his parents even larger apartment (they weren't exactly engaged in his life). He did care about it though. I guess he found my disinterest in wealth a quirky peculiarity and a refreshing change from the girls he was usually attracted to. I saw that he cared about money when I saw the arrogance I was willing to ignore before that night. I also saw narcissism and a constant need for control. I have no idea how I could have missed them, but I did, and as I've said before – I was punished for it.

I managed to hold it together in the face of my parents for a pretty long time before it became obvious to them that I was falling apart at the seams. I came to dinner at night, I appeared to be doing my homework, and most of the time I was – just not to the same standard that I used to be. Work of an above-average standard was easy for me to pull off, but I couldn't keep up the commitment to school that I had previously, I didn't find pleasure in it, but more than that I didn't see light in my future, I didn't see anything to work towards. My parents are interested and as active as they can be in my life, but when you're working as a neurosurgeon or a professor you can't always be paying attention to the decisions of your 17 year old daughter, and up until then they didn't need to be. So for a while they missed my slipping grades, and my sneaking out, and the bags under my eyes. When they got a call from my principle at the end of our third year in New York they started to ask questions, questions that I wasn't willing to answer. They said they didn't know me any more, and whilst it hurt to lie to them and pretend like I was being your average rebellious teenager, it hurt more to consider telling them what had really happened. They loved me, but they couldn't handle me, and they certainly couldn't handle me in New York, so they sent me to live with my grandmother back in Ipswich, a place I hadn't been in almost five years. I don't blame them for it, and I don't love them any less – I would have done the same thing knowing only what they know, but it still hurts. They think it's going to be good for me to "go home," so to speak. I have an aunty here, and a grandmother, and the boys I grew up with those many years ago, though I don't know what good they'll all do.

My parents think this place has less distractions, and they're right... and I'm petrified. I'm afraid to be with my own thoughts.

Term starts at Spenser Academy tomorrow, the place I'm now going to school, the same place as the boys, though I've already been here a week. My grandmother has been overcompensating by making sure she's always around, and in this place it's the last thing I want. I guess it's made me realise that whilst I was surrounding myself with constant distractions in its many forms in New York, I was completely alone, and I did that on purpose. All of my relationships were superficial, were temporary. I don't want that to change, I don't want to have to open up to anyone, I don't want them to see me up close, to see how broken I am, but it's harder to hide your craving for isolation when that literally means being by yourself, because I can't hide behind distractions, loud music and flashing lights like I did in New York. I've acted courteously towards my grandmother, I give her hugs and tell her I appreciate her taking me in but I spend as much time as I can in my room. I can't keep up the happily sarcastic facade any more – I wonder if I can get away with hiding the whole year? I just have to put my head down and survive one more year before I'm free to runaway and hide in some dark corner of the world. Like I said, I can get good grades without trying, so that shouldn't be hard – it's the people I'm worried about. I'm worried about my grandmother, I'm worried that the boys will expect more, will expect me to be my old happy self. Those boys were like my brothers, we knew each other inside and out. But surely none of us can expect to be as close as we were, maybe they don't even know I'm back, and if they do, surely they don't care – it would be easier that way. I trusted them too, they'd be the only ones I would have trusted with a secret like mine, but I don't know them like that any more. They couldn't know, no one could.

I pray to whoever's or whatever's out there – just let me get through this year.

**In the next chapter I will describe what she looks like – possibly from Reid's perspective, I'll have to see if I can pull him off – or if I'll just have to stick to her perspective. I'll also put some photos up of what I picture her to look like on my profile (I may also put a picture up of Reid's absent-from-the-movie-car... most other fanfics have it so that he's lost his license or crashed his car – well not this time). **

**This is assuming I continue the story. What do you think?**

**I repeat, this is my first fanfic, I really do hope you like it. Please review.**

**PS. Sorry about the language and themes – I hope the rating's OK.**


	2. Kasey's Back

**Firstly, a shout out to kvsgrl, my first reviewer! My hero. And to Trickster707 because second's not too shabby either.**

**Secondly, I'm afraid to announce that I've made an arguably important executive decision: a certain oft-loved couple is no more... Kate has been demoted to friend. To those Pogue/Kate loyalists, I hope you'll stop hating me eventually and learn to love what I think I have in store for Pogue instead (which isn't what I think you're thinking it is). **

**Also, for the sake of continuity – the newspaper Caleb has on the passenger seat of his car says 'Student Found Dead: Police Break Up Annual Spenser Party,' as opposed to 'Student Found Dead of Overdose: Police Break Up Annual Spenser Party.'**

**Again, this is my first fanfic, so please be as patient as possible and enjoy! (And review if you can, it makes me deliriously happy). **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but my OC (and possible future OC's). **

Reid POV

I was woken up by the annoying whine of some Britney Spears song – my phone's ringtone for a week, courtesy of Tyler. _I really have to change that._ I'd decided to stay at home one more night – for the double bed and the home made breakfast – which is why Tyler was calling me as opposed to hitting me over the head with a pillow.

'Jesus Tyler, it's 6am – were you not at Nicky's last night? We don't have school for another three hours, why the fuck are you awake?' My voice was muffled by the pillow I still had my head face down on.

'Kasey's back.'

'What?' I was bolt upright.

'Kasey's mum called Mrs Parry last night, Pogue called me a few minutes ago. Kasey's back in town!' Tyler sounded just as psyched as I was. 'She got in a few days ago, I think.'

'Holy shit! How's long's it been? Four years?'

'Five, actually.'

'Man, I wonder what she looks like?' I mused into the phone.

'Reid! She's practically our sister...' _Tyler. So PC. _

'Not like that, dickhead... although I do recall my thirteen year old self finding her pretty hot.'

'Reid.'

'Well I'm psyched either way. She's at Spenser, right?'

'Yeah, where else? But she's not staying at the dorms – she's living with her grandmother down the road from Caleb.'

_Damn._ 'That blows, but it's better than New York I guess. And why the fuck hasn't she called?'

'I don't know man, five years is a long time and we've hardly kept in contact.' Tyler sounded guilty. I wasn't surprised, we all felt the same. 'Oh yeah,' Tyler continued, 'I almost forgot – the guy from Spencer supposedly OD'd.'

'Hmm... don't do drugs kiddies.' I should be more shocked but it's not the first time some rich kid has died of an overdose and frankly, I didn't know the guy.

'Yeah, Reid, the only reason you don't do drugs is because you _use_ every other hour.'

'Hell you guys are sensitive. Your mum uses more than I do.'

'My mum doesn't have powers Reid.'

'It's a mum joke Tyler. Be more socially awkward. And anyway, what's a little cliff diving and up-skirt action? A couple of wrinkles in 20 years time.'

'Tell that to Caleb's Dad.' Tyler had a point, Caleb's dad looked well over 100 and he's only 44. But fuck it, we're still young, there's time to ease up later.

'Whatever,' I said casually. 'So, I forgive you for calling at 6am, but I'm going back to sleep now so I'll see you at school _baby_ boy.'

'Fuck off Reid.'

'Goodbye gorgeous!' I said in the cheesiest voice I could muster on four hours sleep. I snapped the phone shut.

I rolled back over onto my front and splayed out over the double bed – that was my last night the in comfort of such luxuries before it was back to Spenser and into my comparatively tiny room with Tyler. _Awesome. _Although I guess it did give me more freedom – not that my parents were particularly strict, it was more that I just didn't want them to know what I was doing and less that they'd try to stop me. Spenser could certainly be paying more attention to the goings on in their student dorms. I'm glad they're not._ Right, time to go back to sleep now_.

But I couldn't fall asleep again, not after that news. Kasey was back. Kasey! The girl we'd grown up with. Tyler was right – she _is_ practically our sister, or at least she was. Before we got the news that at 13 we'd be getting our first taste of the highly exclusive, very gender specific Covenant, nothing could keep us apart. We'd all felt bad when we had to start keeping secrets from her, but our dads would have killed us if we'd told her. Maybe we could have eventually, but not then, not when even we didn't know what it meant to inherit those powers. She left before we really got a chance to reconcile with her. That fucking sucked.

I couldn't wait to see her again - I missed that feisty little sarcastic brunette. Tyler's fun to wind up, but he really doesn't have the same bite as Kasey. Yeah I was curious to see what she looked like, but what I really wanted to know was if she'd changed. I hoped like hell that things could automatically go back to the way they used to be – I know that's really stupid, but come on, she was still Kasey and if I couldn't see the real her at first I'd sure as hell bring it out again.

I got up eventually, had a shower, and packed my bag with the things I needed that mum hadn't dropped off to Spenser a couple of days beforehand – basically my phone, a pair of gloves and my beanie – I shoved them next to my maths and history text books (which I sure as hell didn't put in there). 'Mum get out of my bag!' I yelled down the stairs as I rounded the end of the hallway at my end of the house. I was pushing my luck thinking she'd hear me in the kitchen downstairs considering the size of the house.

'Oh relax honey, it's not like I was looking for drugs... I was packing the books I knew you'd forget' she yelled back. The woman thought ahead.

She leaned on the counter, still in her nightgown, one hand holding a glass of orange juice as I ate the breakfast that the chef had made. Dad was a better cook than mum had never attempted to be. I got up, eager to see the girl I'd been thinking about all morning. 'K' well, see you later,' I said.

'Your dad says goodbye. Call if you need anything and for Christ's sake – drive safely.'

'Yep,' I responded easily. I had no intention of driving slowly, if that's what she'd meant – and she had.

I got into the 1967 black, custom Camaro SS – a revamped 16th birthday present. I had received a BMW. It wasn't as fast as Caleb's Mustang or Pogue's bike, but its sure as hell looked better, and the driver had far more skill behind the wheel. I took it easy down the driveway and the first half of the street but by the time I'd hit the main road I was gunning it – it took me 10 minutes to get to Spenser. I cruised loudly into the student parking lot and pulled up next to Tyler's Hummer H3 at around 8am.

'You're early,' Tyler said in disbelief.

'So? I can be early,' I responded with mock-indignation.

'Yeah, you're never early Reid.'

'Well fuck, sue me, I wanna see Kasey.'

'She's not here yet' Tyler responded quickly.

'Oh so someone else is keen too.'

'Well fuck, sue me,' Tyler imitated me.

'Hey boys,' Pogue said as he approached us next to Tyler's car from across the parking lot. 'Sup Pogue,' Tyler said and they exchanged our customary fist punch. 'Hey man,' Pogue said in my direction, 'just forget about last night with Caleb, yeah? He's just stressed out 'cause he's ascending first.'

'Yeah it's fine, whatever,' I responded. Caleb and I weren't exactly the best of friends but he was still like a brother. We see things differently sometimes, so brothers fight. We fight. We get over it... eventually, I just wish he'd stop fucking riding me for shit every second day. He might be ascending first but that doesn't make him the leader of the covenant. When was the vote that put him in charge? Whatever.

'Have you seen Kasey?' Pogue asked.

'Nup, Reid and I were just...'

'_Who_ is _that_?' I said to Tyler and Pogue with incredulity as I saw a girl getting out of a silver Mercedes C-Class Sedan across the other side of the lot near Pogue's bright yellow bike. The only reason I know what car she was driving is because I noticed it before I noticed her. Once she got out, I couldn't think about anything else. She was _stunning_, the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. She had long legs, a long neck, and dark, rich brown, wavy hair that fell past her shoulders. She was slim but had both an athletic and curvaceous build. _How is that even possible?_ She had olive skin, like her great-grandmother was from Spain, and as she glanced briefly to the side to make sure the car was locked I saw dark, piercing eyes obscured slightly by loose bangs. I was gobsmacked. We all stood in silence for at least 30 seconds as we watched her throw her bag over her right shoulder, grab her books from on top of the car and walk towards the side entrance to the school.

'That's Kasey, man,' Tyler said weakly.

**Hope you liked my second chapter. I'm excited to have some interaction between Kasey and the boys – we'll have to see how it goes down. **

**Please review, they are appreciated more than you know!**

**PS. So I'm going to post pictures of Reid's car and what I envision Kasey to look like on my profile as soon as I put this up.**


	3. Meeting Sofie

**If you're still reading – thank you! I hope you enjoy this next chapter. **

**Disclaimer: I own only my OCs.**

Kasey POV

I jerked awake at 6am, feeling moisture on my cheeks, and more tired than I had been when I'd gone to bed last night. As I filled my lungs with air I closed my eyes again and tried to will away the anxiety. _Pain. Sharp. Scraping down my arms... Nails – digging into my hips. _My eyes opened in an instant. _What fucking relief is there if I can't even find refuge in my own head?... Yep, and that's what got you here Kasey._ So I laid there with my eyes open, exhausted, for at least another 45 minutes before I extracted myself from under my blankets and headed for the shower. I threw my hair up in a messy bun, not caring about the stray strands that didn't feel like cooperating this morning. I should have cared more, one should look respectable on their first day at a new school, but I really didn't have the energy. The warm water streaming down the back of my neck felt good. I leaned against the cold, tiled wall and listened to the water hit the base of the shower.

I left the house at quarter to seven, before Nan was up – I didn't feel like answering a hundred and one questions about whether I was OK and ready for my first day of school with a chirpy 'Yep, sure am.'

It was too early to head straight to Spenser so I took a detour and drove through some back streets around Ipswich, past our old house, past the beginning of the hiking trail I used to walk with my parents – it lead to a lookout at Ipswich River. You could also drive there, but the road ends a good mile from the river itself and you end up having to walk anyway. The trail was beautiful, especially in autumn – you couldn't see the ground beneath you, only an ocean of gold and red leaves. I contemplated walking it again. It would never feel the same as it did when I was a child, but maybe the solitude would provide a different kind of comfort. I looked at the clock on the dash of my grandmother's car – a silver Mercedes sedan – and thought I could get away with heading to school now, surely the library was open or something.

Pulling into the student parking lot at around ten past eight, I was completely immersed in my own thoughts; Radiohead's 'I Might Be Wrong' was playing on my iPod through the car's stereo. I looked out the window at the side entrance to the school. _Jesus, this place is huge. _

My old school was big, for New York, but amidst the high-rise skyline of the city it had seemed fairly small. Amidst the open space of Ipswich, Spenser didn't suffer from this illusion, it seemed huge. I had looked at the school when we were thinking I'd do high school here, but I'd completely forgotten my impressions of it. The buildings seemed like Victorian castles, connected via small roads and a series of paved, parallel and perpendicular paths that marched through well kept lawns covered in fallen leaves. Here and there dark, thick trees rose up, sometimes accompanied by a bench for students to enjoy in the summer. At the moment everything was wet. Amongst the walkways in some areas were patches of grass, turned mud, where students had gone off the path too much. One of the ovals, the one I could see from where I had parked was also covered in these patches – grass undermined by winter over the break. It had been raining all morning, but had stopped for the moment, and a thick mist hung in the air.

I grabbed my bag and books from the passenger seat, pulled my iPod from the dock and stepped out the car. Putting the books on top of the car, I plugged my earphones into the iPod, put them in my ears, and grabbed the books again. Turning towards the school, I took another deep breath, one of many punctuating my day so far, and I'm sure not the last, and headed towards the stone building looming straight ahead.

Just past the huge, wooden side doors of the entranceway was a simple map of the school that included its buildings and other important details – like where the provost's office, the main library, and the cafeteria were. I repeated the direction of the library to myself a number of times before I headed off down the hallway. The halls of the school were starting to fill with students by this time, most of whom appeared to be chatting away loudly, undoubtedly about the recent death of a student at some party over the weekend. This was horrible, but it also made the arrival of a new kid pretty small news by comparison, which was good for me. If they _were_ talking about me, I couldn't hear them as I still had my headphones in. Either way, I didn't want to get involved, so I kept my head down and tried to ignore the occasional staring. I wondered when I'd first see the guys, and how I'd cover up what I'd become. I wondered how they looked now, how much they'd changed as people, and whether they were thinking the same about me. This made me feel slightly nauseous.

I'd made it to the library about half an hour before class was due to start. After browsing Spenser's extensive collection for a while I'd resolved to head for first period English without a book of my own. Firstly, we'd probably be given an extensive reading list anyway, and secondly, I didn't have much patience for reading for pleasure these days – it left me too alone with my own thoughts. Plus, the only books I found myself drawn to at the moment left me more depressed than I had been before I started reading them. I found the classroom I was supposed to be in without much incident, a floor up and slightly to the left of where I was. When I arrived, the classroom, or should I say auditorium, was still pretty empty. I spotted a seat near the back to the left and made a b-line straight to the empty space.

The girl I'd sat next to was wearing a small, black bowler hat. She had pale skin and long, soft blonde hair coming out from underneath the hat. She appeared to be doodling on an open pad of paper in front of her. I liked the fact that she was wearing a hat not of the school uniform.

Once I'd settled into my seat I took my headphones out of my ears and fumbled around in my bag for the iPod, I could still hear the music playing. _Jesus, I'm probably rendering myself deaf._

'Radiohead,' the girl next to me said.

'Huh?'

'You're listening to Radiohead,' she repeated herself.

'Oh... yeah, you like Radiohead?' I responded coherently this time. Obviously my week long self imposed isolation had taken its toll.

'Love 'em... and I knew couldn't be the only one,' she smiled.

'You should move to New York,' I smiled back.

'Oh, fantastic – you're from New York?' She sounded interested, but not in an over-excited way. Low key. This was good. I felt I really couldn't handle anyone more than low key right now.

'Yeah, grew up here though,' I answered.

'I moved here a few years ago from DC with my parents. The name's Sofie.'

'Kasey, nice to meet you.'

'Likewise,' she she smiled again.

After the classroom had pretty much filled up, the teacher entered. I looked around the room to see if I could spot the boys, but all I could see was mostly the back of heads. _Damn, should have been paying more attention._ The teacher wrote his name on the board, _Mr Pennyworth_.

'Good morning,' the teacher began. 'Mr Danvers, Provost Higgins requests the pleasure of your company after class. Now, we're going to study four American contemporary writers of fiction...' his words drained off.

_Danvers. _I looked down and finally recognised the first two of the boys I'd been searching for. _Caleb. And that's definitely Pogue next to him with the long hair. Holy crap! _I leaned forward slightly to try and get a better view, but still got mostly hair. Especially Pogue's. Before I could pay any more attention to my new discovery I heard a cocky voice yell out from the other side of the room 'Yeah, Dreamcatcher was the shit!'

_I recognise that voice. _I leaned forward again, this time looking down to the very left of the class. It was Reid. He still had bright blonde hair and a stupid smirk on his face. People were still laughing at his full-of-shit jokes... but he was beautiful. He had completely grown into his gangly limbs and skinny face. He was now just tall and muscley. _Jesus, what a cliché_, I thought to myself. _Is that Tyler! Holy crap. _I couldn't help but repeat myself. The kids I'd grown up with were gone. Who were these guys? They looked exactly the same and yet completely different. The perfect versions of their younger selves, who I'd loved so much. My guys. _Thank God I sat up the back._ I can't imagine what it would have been like if I'd ended up next to one of them and accidentally choked in the middle of my first class. I needed the relative comfort of the back of the classroom to take in what I was seeing.

'Thank you Mr Garwin, but no, my choice is The Shining,' Mr Pennyworth turned around as the laughter died out. He then looked in our direction as something caught his eye. 'Miss Halstrom, remove that hat or receive your first detention for the year.' _WHY_ _did you have to sit here Kasey? _I berated myself as most of the class turned their heads to look up at her, at us. Caleb caught my eye and smiled widely at me. I smiled back as widely as I could without drawing more attention to myself. I looked at Pogue, he had a similar look to Caleb on his face. I didn't look over at Reid and Ty, it would have been too obvious that I'd known exactly where each of them was due to excessive staring.

_Well, I guess there's no avoiding a reunion now, for better or worse._

**I know it's moving slower than some of you might like but I had a character to introduce, plus I didn't want to rush things. I hope it's interesting none the less. And don't worry – we'll get there. **

**I'm posting a picture of Sofie on my profile (you might see some of my inspiration for her character there, although her hat is different, but the hat thing created this whole character in my mind... we'll see how she goes). **

**Please review, and thanks for still reading. **


	4. Reunions

**Thank you everyone for your lovely reviews, they are endlessly appreciated – thank you especially to kvsgrl and Trickster707 for reviewing each chapter. **

**I'm really nervous about this chapter, the reunion – whether it's big or not, I'll let you decide. Please like it. **

**Disclaimer: I own only my OCs.**

_Hmm... Whether to walk calmly to the door and make a run for it, or take a very deep breath and face what I've been dreading._ I wanted so badly to be a coward, to slink down those stairs at the end of the class, creep to the door, pass silently around the corner, run as fast as I could to my car and drive... anywhere. But I owed it to the guys to stay, to face them. I owed it to them to at least say hello.

It would have been so much easier if they hadn't noticed that I'd come back. Then I wouldn't have to pretend like I'm the happy, well rounded, wittier version of my twelve year old self, because I'm not. More than that, I was afraid that I'd convince myself they care and get attached. And after I'd put myself out there and realised I was actually alone, I'd be too far gone to pretend like I was ever here in the first place, which is what I've been managing to do, on a knife's edge, for the last six months – pretend like I'm here. They couldn't possibly care, or carry the weight of what I went through, so yes... I'd be alone again, and it was better to stay alone than taste false comfort and have it taken away again. I'd worked so hard to numb myself to the pain that I was numb to everything. Allowing myself to feel again, in any capacity, would be suicidal. I needed to stay unattached. _Stay unattached Kasey_.

Caleb made some motion to Pogue and rushed off at the end of class to see the provost, no doubt, but Pogue, Tyler and Reid all lingered just outside the door. I could see them as I slowly shoved my belongings in my bag and got up from where I was sitting. I let Sofie head down before me and she nodded goodbye as she passed. I took that very deep breath and walked down the stairs of the auditorium.

As I rounded the corner I was immediately swept off my feet into a huge, suffocating hug. For a moment I held back, letting all my reservations race through my brain, and trying to control the images that burst into my head when someone pressed against me too hard. But as I felt those arms around my back, those palms reaching around to my sides, completely encasing me, I let go. This felt different somehow. I reached my arms around Reid's neck (I could tell from the blond hair that my face was now immersed in) and squeezed as tightly as I could in return. As I took a deep breath I realised how amazing he smelt – nothing like your average adolescent boy. He smelt _comforting_. It had been a long time since I'd had physical contact with someone who I wasn't sleeping with. I avoided hugs, and when I couldn't I only lent in half-heartedly, attempting to fulfil the minimum social requirements. When it came to sex I always had to have control – to be on top, or be the dominating one somehow. Besides, as I've said before, sex still felt like something I was inflicting on myself in an attempt to reclaim it.

'Kase,' he said softly into my ear.

'Reid,' I smiled into his hair. The hug felt like it lasted for hours.

'Put her down, would you? There's some other people here who want a turn,' Tyler piped up. I laughed genuinely, for the first time in ages.

Reid put me down gently and Tyler took his place, though his hug was far gentler, and my feet stayed on the ground. It still seemed like genuine affection though. 'Kase, it's good to see you.'

'You too Ty, you have no idea.' I tried my hardest to make sure my voice didn't betray just how little of an idea he had. _Stay unattached Kasey._

Next came Pogue, and I was again lifted off my feet. 'Kasey,' he laughed, 'you're big news around here. We've missed you beautiful.'

'Oh Jesus Pogue, you're gonna make me blush,' I said in a mocking tone. He put me down and I punched his arm. He grabbed the arm with his other hand and pretended like he was wounded, all the while making some stupid face. I looked over and saw Reid leaning against the wall with his hands in his pockets, just smiling at me. Tyler was standing close by laughing at Pogue's antics.

Seeing them now made me wonder again about how much things had changed. Caleb was always the most serious of the guys – he always seemed to lead the group somehow. Reid and Pogue were always the ones I joked around with, or the ones trying their best to piss me off and get a laugh at least. Tyler was always laughing along. He was smarter than he was funny, both he and Caleb were, but he copped a lot of shit for being the youngest one out of us all. Reid liked to pitch himself as the rebellious one – always the first to jump of the highest board into the pool, or talk to a girl, or claim he'd driven his dad's car. _At twelve years old. Right Reid._ I wondered how he was rebelling these days. Pogue wasn't far behind, but he never took things as far, especially because he and Caleb were pretty close and Caleb tended to disapprove of Reid's schemes – we used to call him 'Dad'. Tyler just always seemed happy to be there.

'Caleb apologises for not being here – he had to...'

'...Go see the provost, I heard,' I cut Pogue off, 'Caleb couldn't possibly be in trouble?'

'Hah, yeah unlikely,' Pogue laughed awkwardly. _Strange. Maybe things have changed._ He glanced at Reid for a second before continuing. 'So what have you got now?'

'Oh uh... just a study period,' I stumbled a bit over my words, not sure that I wanted to extend this any longer. I suddenly started to feel the weight of the situation bearing down on me. My perfectly crafted plan to stay removed from everyone was starting to fray... after one hour. If I allowed myself to feel anything again, I would feel everything. I couldn't numb myself from some emotions and not others. _Fuck_. Reid had pushed himself off the wall now and all three of the guys were standing right in front of me.

'Nice, you wanna hang until next period?' Reid asked.

'Don't you guys have business ed?' I asked, trying to avoid the question. I had opted for a language over business ed – Latin, which I'd done in New York. Most people at Spenser did business ed, I figured they'd be doing it too.

'We'll skip it, whatever, it's only first day.'

'No, no don't do that for me, it's fine – I'll be around, we'll hang out at lunch or something,' I said, still trying to be vague. Reid looked me directly in the eye and I could see he was suspicious. There was an awkward moment before Tyler said 'no worries – see you at lunch Kase.' He took a step towards me and gave me a quick hug.

'K, see you soon Kase,' Pogue said, resigned. He leaned in again and gave me a sizeable squeeze before turning around and following Ty down the hallway. Reid also gave me a quick but firm hug, but as he turned to go he stopped and looked at me.

'You alright?' Reid said hesitantly.

'Yeah I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?' I said in my most convincing voice.

He looked at me for another second before saying 'Cool, well, see you at lunch?' He didn't look entirely convinced. 'Yep,' I offered as noncommitally as possible. He smiled at me before turning and heading after Tyler and Pogue, but his eyes looked... concerned? I must be hallucinating sympathy. _Jesus I have to get out of here._

I walked as calmly as possible in the opposite direction, back towards my car. I tried to smile, tried to recapture those feelings of happiness I'd felt when I'd been in Reid's arms, but I was overwhelmed. I'd opened myself up and I couldn't close again. I started to run. Reaching my car five minutes later I scrambled for the handle and yanked the door open, throwing myself inside onto the driver's seat, slamming the door behind me and bursting into tears. I hit the back of my head against the headrest, over and over again, trying to contain the tears that I had been holding back for what had felt like an eternity. I pushed the balls of my palms into my eyes as hard as I could, willing the tears back. It hit me – the torrent of crap that had hit the fan months ago that I hadn't allowed myself to acknowledge fully until now – what had happened that night and what I'd done to avoid it.

It fucking hurt.

_I need something. Now._

**Ok. Well, there it is. The reunion (minus one). I hope it's not a let down. **

**I know it's a short chapter, sorry, but it's jam-packed full of reunion hugs and it was in between classes.**

**Please do review. Reviews are _much_ appreciated. **


	5. Trying to Cope

**Thank you so much to those who reviewed, your feedback means the world (kvsgrl you continue to rule and thank you Venetiangrl92). For those of you who have put this story on alert I would love to hear what you think as well. **

**I have been particularly inspired for some later chapters but there is a fair bit to do before then, hopefully the chapters in between will still be entertaining though. That's fairly cryptic but anyway, I thought you might like to know I've been inspired. **

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I only own my OCs.**

I backed out of the parking space I was in as quickly as possible, put my foot to the gas and sped home as fast as I could without drawing too much attention to myself. Pulling in to her spot at the top of the driveway I thanked whatever, or whoever's out there that Nan wasn't home. When I got inside I took the main stairs two at a time, stumbling at the top but not caring – I needed to find where she kept them. I checked her bathroom cabinet, the top draw of her dresser, all three sock draws in her walk-in, and finally a semi-concealed draw under her bed. It was an old, high four-poster, with a draw built into the wood directly bellow the pillows on each side, right near the floor. I sighed with relief as I saw Nan's extensive collection of pain medication – for her back. Her pain had been around for a while but it wasn't overly debilitating, she just happened to have a stock pile because of my mother's profession. I sifted through the bottles, checking the labels for something I recognised, something strong. I sighed with relief - Anexsia.

There were two large bottles, I grabbed one, poured half the container of pills onto the bed, shut the lid, placed the bottle back carefully and slid the drawer back into place. Scooping the pills off the bed I headed for my room, found an empty Vitamin C container and poured all but two pills into it. I shoved the remaining two pills into my mouth and swallowed heavily. Next, I headed over to my bag which was sitting mostly unpacked in the corner of my room. Sticking my hand in I found my bulky, black woollen sweater and yanked it out. As I did this, the silver flask fell to the ground. A pang of guilt struck me as I remembered lying to my parents, promising I'd try to be better, and sticking the flask of vodka into the bag at the last minute – a safety net, in case I was desperate. If I needed more I'd get my hands on it somehow. I wanted to do better, for them, but the thought of moving to a small town with no distractions and nothing but my thoughts to pass the time seemed worse than lying to my parents. I'd done great, until now. A week sitting alone in my room and not once had I gotten the flask out.

I headed back down to the car, the new additions to my bag weighing heavily on my brain. I needed to get out of the house before Nan came back. I headed for the only place I could think of – the old trail. It wasn't far from here, nowhere in the town was, but I was sure it would be deserted at this time of year. I was right. I drove to the point in the road where it meets the track that takes you to the river and got out of the car. I hadn't passed another vehicle since I'd left the town-proper. Near the car, just behind the wooden barrier that bordered the small parking area, I sat alone, my back against a plank. I took two more pills from the vitamin container and a swig from the flask and sighed with relief. I tried to focus on the taste of the alcohol and the chill nipping at my face, and not what I was running from. I was suddenly exhausted. Resting my eyes, I took another couple of drinks from the flask, fastened the lid and laid it in my lap, still gripping it tightly. _Focus on the cold. Focus on the smell of the woods. _The last thing I remember was feeling the world start to spin as my eyelids lay heavily over my eyes.

I woke up with a start – something wet had hit my cheek. It was dark where I was sitting but as I looked up through the canopy I could see it was twilight. Big drops of rain were starting to come down through the trees. _Holy crap, how long have I been sleeping?_ I got up quickly, forgetting myself, and almost went back down again, but managed to catch myself on the barrier I'd been sleeping against. Standing up slowly I took a breath and opened my eyes to see if I was still dizzy. _Nope, good. _I really needed to drive home.

Hoping the school hadn't noticed my absence on account of it being the first day I composed myself and prayed that Nan wasn't suspicious. The car clock said 5pm. Not _so_ bad. _Seven missed calls... whoops. _I pulled in to the car space furthest from the house as Nan was now home.

'Where have you been sweetheart? I was starting to get worried.'

'Sorry Nan, I caught up with Caleb and the other guys for a couple of hours after school. I forgot to turn my phone off silent' I replied seamlessly.

'That's funny – Caleb called here earlier asking for you.'

_Shit!... What? _'Oh really? What time?'

'Around three-fifteen.'

'Oh yeah... I said I might go home for and get changed, but I decided not to. He must of called before he caught up with us.' I felt sick in my stomach, lying to my grandmother. _Actually Nan, I came home after first period, stole a bunch of painkillers from your secret stash, went into the woods and fell asleep by myself for six hours. That cool? _She smiled. 'Well please try and remember in future' she said sweetly. _Thank God he apparently didn't ask why I wasn't at school after first period. Why does he even have this number!_

'No worries,' I responded as I walked over and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

'Kathryn's made ravioli for dinner, are you hungry?' Nan said. Kathryn was the chef. She lived nearby and mostly cooked dinner, but other meals too depending on the occasion and the day of the week. She'd usually come over on weekends for breakfast. Nan loved to cook so she wasn't all that fussed that Kathryn wasn't there 24/7.

'That sounds delicious, Nan, thank you. Do you mind if I take it to my room though, I've got a lot of reading to do, you know – first day and all.' _I'm not in the slightest bit hungry._

'Oh, OK... of course.' She looked a little disappointed but I really couldn't sit there lying to her for another half an hour.

'You're the best,' I said as I grabbed a plate from the large wooden bench in the middle of the kitchen and made my way up to my room, my bag still slung over my shoulder. There were two sets of stairs up to the second level of the estate from the first, one near the kitchen, laundry and back door, and one near the main entrance to the house. The kitchen stairs continue, after a small landing, up to the third level. A separate set of stairs to, but near the entrance ones take you up from the second level at the other end of the house. The kitchen stairs are more of a back route but take me close to my room, in a secluded corner on the rear, left hand side of the house. My grandmother's bedroom is a level down and at the other end of the hall, closer to the main entrance.

When I got into my room I put the plate on my desk, dropped my bag on my bed after getting my phone out and sat on the couch. My room, the walls painted white and the floors made of wood, is by no means small. As you walk in the bed is against the centre of the opposite wall, to your right (as the door is in the left corner). It has a dark, wooden frame and grey and white-patterned covers with large, white and silver-embroidered decorative pillows on top. Around the end posts of the bed Nan has hung a delicate string of white fairy-lights. Covering a large part of the floor is a simple, white rug. On the right wall is my desk, also made of wood, with a large picture window behind it that looks out behind the house. To the left of the desk is a set of floating shelves that reach from roof to floor and house an extensive collection of books and a couple of picture frames, one with a photo of my parents, and one of myself with the guys when we were about ten years old, sitting in the garden out the back of the Danvers' estate. On the left wall, closest to the door is an old, leather loveseat with ornate, wooden legs, and to its right is a small dresser with a mirror above, attached to the wall, and a simple wooden stool in front. Above the lounge hangs a huge print of a Matisse sketch in black and white – a single female figure. Once you walk into the room and turn around you can see the double-doors of the wardrobe to the left of the fireplace, which is to the left of the door you walked in. Full length mirrors hang on the inside of the walk-in doors and out the other end is the en suite. Finally, on the opposite wall to the fireplace, on either side of the bed are two sets of thin, wood and glass balcony doors with light-grey curtains falling beside them. The doors take you out onto a narrow balcony looking out to the side of the estate, over a garden and into the woods. Thin strings of vine leaf wind their way around the railings.

I checked my phone, expecting to clear seven missed calls from Nan, but when I clicked on the missed calls icon I saw that in fact only three calls were from her. The remaining four came from two numbers not in my contacts. One, I was guessing, was probably Caleb, who the other was I had no idea. Choosing one of the numbers randomly, I held the phone to my ear and heard it ring a couple of times before a low voice picked up.

'Hello?'

'Uh, hi... I've got a missed call from this number?' I said hesitantly, not at all recognising the voice on the other end.

'Kasey, it's Caleb,' he gave me a warm response.

'Caleb! Hi, I thought this might have been you, Nan said you called the house.'

'Yeah, Pogue got the number from his mum, I got your cell from your Nan, I hope you don't mind?'

'Oh, yeah that's fine.' _Well that covers that._ 'Hey do you know who's number this is?' I said, then proceeded to read out the cell number.

'Yeah that's Reid, he almost seemed worried about you dude - where were you today? The guys said they saw you after English but then you disappeared?' He sounded concerned. _Reid? Reid called me? Since when was Reid the pro-active type? It must have been Ty on his phone. _

'Yeah. I'm fine. Just felt sick... must have been food poisoning or something.' _And the lies start to mount_.

'Food poisoning? From what?'

'Uh... had left over sushi for breakfast this morning. Stupid right?' ...a_nd mount_.

'Damn, well I hope you're feeling better now? It was a bummer I didn't get to see you today.'

'Yeah feeling fine now, thanks. I know, it was a shame you had to run off – everything OK with the Provost?' I said in a half-mocking tone.

'Yeah no worries, just wants me to keep an eye out for this new guy – Chase. You know, trust fund brigade?'

'Right,' I laughed – money and Ipswich residents, nothing's changed.

'So I'll see you tomorrow?'

'Sure thing.'

'Great, good to have you back Kasey,' Caleb finished.

I paused, then said 'Thanks Cale,' smiling sadly to myself as I hung up.

I contemplated whether or not to call Reid but he really did seem suspicious today and I didn't want to have to lie some more to yet another person, so I decided to text him:

'Sorry I missed ur calls. Felt sick after Eng – food poisoning. See u tmoro?'

Within five minutes he'd replied:

'OK, see you tmoro.' _Hmm, weird message for someone who called twice. It was definitely Ty on his phone. _

After I'd attemped a few bites of dinner I browsed through the book shelf and pulled out 'The Picture of Dorian Gray.' I'd read it more than once before but I just wanted something to fill my hands, and the times I was most at risk of thinking too much – those in between times, the pauses in which an ordinary person would rejoice. That person would probably be able to sit next to a window and just look out at the view. I found my hands started to shake, and my insides started to squirm. Images filled my head and I had to get up and move again.

I had a shower, chucked my pyjamas on, plugged my iPod into the speakers on my desk and climbed into bed, throwing the pillows onto the couch (most ended up on the floor in front). I got the book off the night stand and started to read, but even as I read I thought about the day before me and the one ahead. _How_ was I going to hold it together? I took two more pills with a glass of water from the bathroom and put my head on the pillow, letting the music drift in and out as I drifted off.

Reid POV

I'd just gotten back from the pool when I got her message. A-for-asshole and the new guy had had a minor face-off in the locker rooms – I had to hand it to him, the new guy had handled himself pretty well and it was always enjoyable to watch Aaron getting served. _Douche. _I'm definitely a prick, but he's a royal fuckwit. Golden Boy had tried to be the hero and break it up but newbie had it handled, thankfully. I really couldn't stand to watch Caleb revel in his own glow for much longer.

I'd called her twice that afternoon, I couldn't help it, I don't know why. Seeing her earlier was fucking with my brain. I hadn't attempted to hit on one single sophomore or junior in the halls today. Most of the senior girls knew my reputation, but I still managed to pull them – on account of my amazing good looks and unbelievable charm – they just weren't as fun to mess with. Nope, I'd been thinking about Kasey and seeing her this morning. It was unbelievable seeing her again, but she hadn't seemed herself. I know that's a weird thing to say about someone you haven't seen in five years but I_ know _her. I could see her in there. I felt her squeeze back when I picked her up. I also saw it on her face when she completely shut down, like something had clicked. I had been watching her, completely mesmerised by the stunning girl who'd come back after all this time. She was honestly the hottest thing I'd ever seen. Hot doesn't even cover it. She was _beautiful_, and I never fucking say that. But she was also Kasey, one of my best friends, and that made her more appealing than any other girl. So yeah, when I say she didn't seem herself I know what I'm talking about.

_Fuck it, maybe she's just moved on and doesn't want to get to know us. Why should I care? There are plenty of other fish in the sea. _I had thought to myself. It was a lie. There really wasn't anyone else like Kasey.

I don't know if I believed her when she said she'd felt sick. I could see that she didn't want to stay when she'd avoided agreeing to meet us for lunch. She looked like she was desperate to get out of there. Why? I don't know. I was glad she was OK, but I felt frustrated. _I'm not going to stick my neck out if she doesn't want to see us – whatever, that's her call. _So I wrote back a short 'OK, see you tmoro.'

I couldn't stop thinking about the real Kasey that I'd seen for a split second this morning, though, and I couldn't help but wonder why she was holding back. I needed to find out.

**I hope you don't mind Caleb calling Kasey dude, my best friend and I call each other dude all the time and her and Caleb have that sort of relationship. It's not in a stoner sort of way – no Keanu Reeves accents. I hope that comes across. Also, I can't remember which story I got "Golden Boy" from, or if its somewhere in the movie, but it's definitely not mine. If someone knows can you tell me so I can give that story/author credit? Or if you are the author let me know if you want me to change it.**

**On a side note, what did you guys think of Kasey's room? I put a lot of thought into that layout.**

**_Please, please_ review – even tiny, little reviews bring me gigantic amounts of happiness. Thanks for reading!**


	6. Best Laid Plans

**Whilst I'd love more reviews I'm kind of addicted to writing this story, and am really wanting to get to later parts, so I'm going to soldier on and hope that people are liking it despite their relative silence. I'm sure don't need to tell kvsgrl how thankful I am, but I will anyway! Thank you kvsgrl for your speedy, much loved reviews (and Venetiangrl92). **

**I'm sure Kasey will be telling the guys about what happened to her but it won't be for at least another chapter or so. We'll get there though, don't worry. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Covenant or it's characters but I do own my OCs.**

Kasey POV

After the events of the day before, I had decided that keeping my head down completely was a non-option. As much as I craved complete isolation, I couldn't do it – not with the guys around every single day at school. Yes, I knew they'd be around when I'd been considering my options for the year, but I had no idea they'd have so much interest in being around me. Whilst this made some part of me happy, most of me was scared of the consequences. I'd still do my best to avoid them, but I had to learn to suck it up when I couldn't do that, without resorting to drinking, because Ipswich didn't exactly have a crazy night scene that I could seamlessly blend into, especially not one for those under 21. Sure, I had a little pick-me-up, but painkillers weren't really going to deal with anything – they were a band-aid, and a cheap, flimsy, band-aid at that.

I walked in early to first period History, once again avoiding my grandmother at home. Seeing Sofie without a hat, I decided it was probably safe to sit next to her today – we were in an auditorium again. I wasn't intent on making a new friend, but I also didn't want any surprises, or unwanted prying, which I was at risk of getting sitting next to someone I didn't know. She smiled and said hello as I sat down next to her, but soon went back to whatever she was doing. By the time Tyler, Reid, Caleb and Pogue walked in most of the seats were taken, so they were sitting on the other side of the class. Caleb and Reid both spotted me as they were walking in – Caleb waved and Reid nodded.

Five minutes before the end of class Mr Hoffman announced that there was an assessment due in two weeks time, and that it was to be done in pairs – 2000 words on an important historical event in American history, from two perspectives (1000 words on each). We had five minutes to choose a partner 'or else I'll choose one for you,' he finished.

Sofie looked at me questioningly, 'you have any other prospects?'

'Nope, I'm all yours,' I replied.

'Excellent. Salem Witch Trials or the Civil War appeal to you?' She asked.

'Oh, definitely the Trials. Civil War is overdone.'

'Agreed.' And with that I was yet again thrown towards the inevitable prospect of having to socialise... even if it was towards academic ends. _At least its with someone tolerable._ 'I have a free period before lunch today, you don't happen to be free?' Sofie continued.

'Yeah actually, I do. You want to meet at the library.'

'Sure. Gosh we're committed students, just look at us.'

I laughed, 'You're a bad influence. I was planning to put in minimal possible effort.'

'Well if you insist...'

'No, no, you're right – we should start today. Don't tempt me.' I said in a firm tone with a smile on my face.

The bell rang, 'OK, library. Period before lunch.'

'See you then,' I said as I got up and started down the stairs.

Just as I reached the bottom I gasped slightly as I felt a hand grab the top of my arm. 'Kasey, you're not getting away so easily today.' I turned around and saw Caleb smile at me.

'Caleb! Sorry... daydreaming, definitely didn't mean to go without saying hi.'

Caleb and I hugged and had a brief, friendly chat before Pogue joined us at the bottom of the stairs. 'I'm surprised your memory's still functioning with how hard your head this morning man,' he said.

'What?... What happened?' I asked, concerned.

'Swim star here went straight into the wall at practice this morning – slugging it out against the new guy, Chase... Knocked out,' Pogue replied as he nudged Caleb in the arm.

'Jesus Caleb, you OK?'

'Yeah, no I'm fine now. Must've blacked out before I got to the wall... for some reason,' Caleb said the last part through his teeth at Pogue.

'Well, glad you're still breathing. And that's cool – you guys are still swimming then?' I asked Caleb.

'Yeah, Caleb here's still king of freestyle, but I've got him at butterfly.' Pogue responded instead and Caleb laughed. I looked over and saw Ty wave as he and Reid walked out the classroom door furthest from where we were standing. I waved back. I told Pogue and Caleb that I had to head to Latin but I'd see them later, and today I wasn't lying. I was going to stick it out. No running away today. I gave them both a quick hug and started again towards the door.

I managed to hold myself together as promised during morning classes, and met with Sofie, as planned, in the period before lunch at the library. Walking in, I couldn't see her immediately. I made my way further towards the back and peered down a couple of aisles, finally spotting her at a desk in a secluded corner. 'You're lucky I found you here, hiding in the dark,' I said to Sofie.

'Sorry,' she laughed, 'force of habit. It's much easier to escape from the masses in dark corners.'

'I know what you mean,' I said sympathetically. 'You're not a fan of the masses then?'

'Eh... they're OK, I just get tired of the constant chatter sometimes. The bitching. The fakeness. They're not all bad, but there's a lot of intolerable individuals out there.'

'Is there anyone worthy of an honourable mention?' I inquired.

'Oh yeah, there are a few, but unfortunately a couple of them left at the end of last year. My ex, Harry, for example, was supremely tolerable. We're still friends but he's now residing in Canada. Another friend moved to Boston. There are some others but we aren't as close. Speaking of worthy of a mention – I saw you talking to the famed 'Sons of Ipswich'...?'

'Oh. Yeah. I forgot about that label,' I said, slightly taken aback. 'Please don't tell me I'm friends with local celebrities, I'm really not looking for the attention.'

'I'm afraid you are my dear,' she replied in an overly grave voice, 'they are both loved and hated, depending on who you talk to, but they're always known. Tough break.'

'Great,' I said, more to myself than Sofie.

'So, you going to the dance tomorrow?' Sofie changed the subject. School had started mid-week, being the start of semester, hence it was Friday tomorrow. And apparently the start-of-term/Fall dance.

'Honestly, I hadn't thought about it,' which was probably a good thing. I really _hadn't_ thought about it, but since it was on my mind I considered the fact that maybe it wasn't such a bad idea – it might get other things off my mind. My being a recluse plan really wasn't on course any more, so I thought I may as well make the most of it. Screw the consequences. 'Are you?' I asked.

'It's not really my scene, but if you're going I could be convinced. What's not to love about getting dressed up in over the top clothes and consuming too much alcohol. You in?'

I didn't know Sofie, I mean, I'd only met her yesterday, but I liked her – we'd had an instant rapport and seemed to like the same things, at the very least. Plus, despite our rapport, she was also comfortable with silence – this was rare, especially in a teenage girl. 'I'm in. Can we get ready at yours?' I asked her, wanting to evade any possible Nan questions regarding parties, alcohol and responsibility, considering what my parents must have told her about New York. There are consequences for abusing trust, even if said abuse isn't just teenage rebellion, but a way of trying to cope. I stopped myself from following that train of thought – I knew where it lead.

'Sure can. Mum and Dad are away for the weekend... Not that it would really matter, they're still hippies at heart – their parenting style is pretty laid back,' she laughed before continuing. 'They own a rare books store nearby and are off on a scouting mission this weekend.'

'You know what? It doesn't surprise me to hear that about your parents' I laughed kindly. She smiled and rolled her eyes. 'That sounds unbelievably cool though, I would love to have a look at the store sometime.'

'You'd be welcome, they have a pretty great collection at home too – you can check it out tomorrow,' Sofie offered.

After chatting for a little while longer, and deciding we'd meet at her place at 5pm tomorrow, we made some progress on the assessment – she'd be researching the political motivations behind accusations of witchcraft at the time of the Trials and I'd be researching the religious motivations. I'm sure it wasn't exactly what Mr Hoffman had in mind, but we were hoping to get marks for originality. Our meeting flowed well into lunch before we realised what time it was.

'Crap, I said I'd meet the guys for lunch in the cafeteria.'

'Hmm. Well have fun,' she said, making fun of me and my obvious reluctance to go.

'Ohhh no you don't,' I said as I grabbed her bag from the desk. 'you're coming with me lady.'

'What? How'd I get roped into this?'

'If I have to suffer the masses, you're suffering with me, because we need practice for tomorrow. Plus you need some more tolerable people in your life.'

'But we'll have alcohol and pretty lights to distract us tomorrow...'

'Please?' I was almost begging. I'm sure she could see it in my eyes.

'Fine,' she finally agreed.

When we made it to the cafeteria ten minutes later I saw the guys sitting at a table by themselves near the far wall. They all had very serious looks on their faces, it didn't look like casual lunch conversation.

'Kasey! You made it,' Ty stood up and greeted us as we came over, 'Sofie, right?' he added.

I looked at Sofie and stifled a laugh as I caught the expression of shock on her face at being known already. 'Ah, yeah... Tyler?'

'Yep, nice to meet you,' he smiled, 'and that's Caleb, Reid and...'

'Pogue,' Pogue interrupted. Reid and Caleb both said 'hey.' Reid looked at me.

'Sofie,' she smiled back and nodded a greeting, looking at all the guys, but lingering a little longer on Pogue.,

'Have a seat,' Ty said to us and gestured towards the spare seats at the table.

**Sofie is meeting the guys... interesting. Any bets/ideas/suggestions on who she might end up with? Or if she'll end up with anyone? **

**Sorry if not much happened in that chapter. I'm wanting to put the following bit from Reid's perspective and I thought it was more suited to a new chapter. Kasey's next POV will be more eventful.**

**Please, please, review. I never really understood why people would beg for reviews each time they'd post a chapter, but I get it now – they make my day. Thank you for the alerts and the favourites, they are very exciting and gratifying too.**


	7. The Chase Problem

**Hello again. Thank you Venetiangrl92 for reviewing last chapter – you're awesome, much love. **

**Just so you know, I have posted a few new things on my profile regarding this story: the layout of Kasey's room, and two collages relating to Kasey and Sofie. One could argue I have too much time on my hands, but I really don't – I'm procrastinating, avoiding things like uni, and making things very hard for myself. I'll also be posting Kasey and Sofie's fall dance dresses after this or next chapter. **

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I own my OCs, but not The Covenant or its characters.**

Reid POV

We were talking about the awkward and hilarious incident with Caleb in the pool that morning when Tyler spotted Kasey and the blonde chick coming over. I recognised the blonde, but I'd never met her – she had been off limits for the past couple of years owing to, who I assumed was, the boyfriend permanently attached to her arm until now. She was hot, but not so much my style and not as hot as Kasey – no one was. Caleb had sworn that Chase's eyes had turned black in the pool just before he knocked himself out on the wall – I laughed out loud again and got another glare from Caleb. I couldn't decide whether he was just bitter or if he'd actually seen what he said he'd seen. It was like he hadn't seen the end of the pool coming, swimming full tilt into it, which, as much as I hate to admit it, really isn't likely for Golden Boy, seeing as he's swum that length hundreds of times. He was harping on about having to do something that night but he said it was 'best' not to get us involved until he was sure. Yeah he'd tell Pogue, he always does, but he was being cryptic with Baby Boy and I.

'Kasey! You made it... Sofie, right?' Tyler got up and said hi to the girls.

'Ah, yeah... Tyler?' the blonde, Sofie, replied.

Pogue cut in as Tyler was introducing Sofie to us, putting on a show for her. Tyler looked slightly pissed, but only so much that I could tell, and maybe Caleb and Pogue – Tyler's angry invariably still looked 'cute' to ever member of the female population... _pffft_. I said 'hey' to the girl. Kasey looked entertained for the moment, _maybe she is letting her guard down._ She looked comfortable next to Sofie.

There were a number of spare seats at the table and Ty offered them to the girls. I think Baby Boy was hoping Sofie would take the seat next to his, but unfortunately she took the seat next to Pogue instead, as Kasey sat in the seat opposite, next to... _me_.

As the others started to chat away, Kasey leaned in and said 'hey, sorry about yesterday...'

'What about it?' I said, playing dumb.

'Rushing off, not calling you back, etcetera, etcetera...' she paused, 'I'm just finding it a bit full on being back and all... and I had food poising,' she added, as an afterthought.

'So you said. Well I can't help you with the food poisoning, best I can do is advise against sushi, but if you need someone to hang out with, just chill with or whatever – I'm available,' I said the last part in all seriousness.

'Well aren't you a nice guy these days?' She responded.

'What does that mean?' I said, almost affronted.

'I knew you when you were a kid Reid, you forget? You were the budding pre-teen version of a player, and I may have heard through the grape vine that not much has changed,' she said with a raised brow. 'Plus I saw you falling asleep in class this morning next to studious Tyler. What were you up to last night, huh?'

_Pretty much just thinking about you Kasey. _'I may have done some playing in my time Kasey my dear,' I said cheaply, 'but for you, I'll be good.' I made it sound like a joke, but I meant it literally – I really wanted to be good for her, _whether it was as a friend, or..._

'Well that's kind of you sir. I'll be sure to put you on speed dial.' She looked up at me through her long lashes and I could see a smile creeping at the corners of her mouth. My jaw tightened as I took her in.

'So, are you going to the dance tomorrow? Taking some smoking hot date?' Kasey changed the subject.

'If by smoking hot date you mean Baby Boy, then yes...' I laughed. 'A man's got to go single to these events Kasey. Can't be tied down...' I played it up. It honestly was the initial reason I hadn't asked anyone, but with Kasey it town different reasons had come up.

'Aw, well I'd force you to take me but I've already got a hot date...,' I tensed up, unable to help my self. _What the fuck? Who has asked her in the ten seconds she's been in town? Show me the tool... _I didn't have any rights to her though, who was I to get angry? And what the fuck could I expect when she looks like she does? '...my girl Sofie here,' she finished. Sofie looked over and winked at her, laughing.

I simultaneously felt relieved, and like a complete fucking idiot. _Calm down Reid_, I told myself.

'Oh nice,' I said, as controlled as I could. 'Well I'll see you there then Twigs,' I added, using her old nickname – she was always on the slim side and we used to lay into her about it.

'Oh really, we're going there again? Bite me.'

'Love to.' I said, meeting her stare straight on, prepared this time.

'Whatever,' she looked away after a second... almost blushing? _If only she was blushing like the other girls did, and not just out of frustration. _She always used to end on 'whatever' and walk away when I was being a dick.

At this moment Kate and Sarah walked up. Kate put a hand on Pogue's back and said hi before taking a seat next to Tyler on the other side and end of the table and saying hi to the rest of us. She and Pogue were good friends. Long story short – they'd broken up about six months ago after having gone out for a year or so. Pogue'd said they were trying to force the relationship because they'd thought, after being good friends for years, that they were attracted to each other. Turns out they're better as friends. Either way, I didn't really get the appeal of relationships. Sarah sat next to Golden Boy, the winner of _that_ round, and they exchanged a kiss. It was probably a good thing he scored Sarah – Kate was around a fair bit and I didn't want to have to deal with constantly trying to avoid awkward post-one night stand talk. Like I said, I didn't really get the appeal of relationships. Then I thought about Kasey...

Caleb introduced Sarah and Kate to the girls at the other end of the table. Kate said she and Sofie had talked a couple of times in Chemistry and Vis Arts. Sarah, being a newbie like Kasey, didn't really know anyone besides Kate and us yet.

Everyone got along well enough. Kate was pretty obviously trying to figure Kasey out – she had caught her attention being that she knew us even before Kate did. Jealous much? Kasey played along, though I'm sure she figured out Kate's game. Her face kind of lit up when she was telling stories about our more embarrassing moments growing up, like she hadn't been as happy since.

Talking to Kasey was definitely the highlight of the day. She seemed more her self then she had yesterday, and she apologised for lying, kind of, but I still didn't know what was up with her.

Things went superbly fucking downhill from there.

At around 9pm Tyler got a call from Pogue asking us to meet him and Caleb at the Colony House. Ty said he he sounded serious. 'Sounds like they looked into Caleb's Chase story,' he said, 'but Pogue didn't tell me what they found, he says hurry up though.' Ty and I drove there in his car from the dorms, and when we arrived Pogue briefed us on everything – the supreme leader hadn't arrived yet. Turns out both he and Caleb had seen darklings over the past few days, and on account of Caleb's 'accident' this morning had broken into Spenser's admissions office to try and find out more about Chase. You know they've done something pretty fucked up when even I'm saying 'don't you think that's a little fucking drastic?' He told us they had discovered that Chase's real last name was actually Pope, but not everything had fallen into place yet. 'You'll see,' Pogue responded, then Caleb arrived.

Caleb pulled out the grimoire with a flash of his eyes and we sat at the Covenant table – the flames igniting to seal the circle, protecting the room from darklings and other prying forces.

'A list of names that brought charges against John Putnam...' Caleb dove into his theory.

After a while I said 'so what?' – frustrated that this was taking so long because Caleb hadn't talked to us earlier, and pissed that he just couldn't handle losing. But the pieces started to come together. Tyler had felt someone use the other night, in a big way. He had told me but I'd brushed him off – saying Caleb and his sidekick didn't have the balls to use that much. More importantly, birth records and last names started to reveal an impossible, and really fucking inconvenient fact.

'If what you're saying is true and Hagan Pope is the bastard son of John Putnam, then the fifth line in the Covenant didn't end at Salem,' Tyler said.

'...And Chase is one of us,' Caleb finished.

I argued, saying that it couldn't possibly be true. Caleb brought up the power surges and asked if I was lying when I said it wasn't me. Mother fucker _never_ fucking trusts me. 'No,' I said, anger dripping off the word. 'You swear?' He pressed.

'I swear.'

'Then it was him.' We sat in silence for a moment, trying to deal with this ridiculous realisation – right under our noses, kissing ass all week, especially Caleb's, _hah_.

Just then Caleb's phone rang – it was Sarah. Before we'd had time to process the previous bombshell Caleb told us that Chase had put a spell on Kate – Creation – spiders. Pogue flew off the handle.

'…They're taking her to a hospital in Gloucester.' Pogue got up. 'Wait! Don't do anything until we know...'

'You're taking about Kate!' Pogue cut Caleb off.

_Fuck. _

One Hour Later

My phone rang, it was Caleb. 'They found Pogue man.'

'What? Where!' Each of us had rung him about ten times, especially after finding out that he hadn't arrived at the hospital when he should have. We'd ended the meeting and Caleb said he was going to check on Sarah.

'He's in the hospital, _with_ Kate. "Bike accident". I just had a little confrontation with Chase. It was no accident. Sarah's in danger too. We all are. Just come to the hospital ASAP and I'll tell you what happened.'

'Is Pogue alright?'

'He's hurt pretty bad but he's alive.'

'OK, see you soon.' I hung up and told Tyler what had happened. 'We have to check on Kasey man,' I demanded.

'Reid, I care about Kasey as much as you do, and I'd say we also need to check on Sophie but honestly, if he hasn't made a threat against them, I think we should leave them alone – drawing attention to them is a _bad_ idea.'

'Fuck Tyler, it's Kasey!'

'I know Reid, relax. Chase didn't mention her. We've only really talked to her twice in the past two days – he probably doesn't even know about her. Just leave it. Trust me.'

I said 'fine' as we were heading out the door to the dorms and towards the car, but told Tyler that I had forgotten something. As I went back and rounded the corner I stopped and looked around – there was a stairwell leading to the rarely used floor below – the dorm basement and storage area. I walked down the stairs to the first landing.

I knew they'd all feel it, but I didn't have a choice. This time I _would _lie, 'it must have been Chase.'

Taking a deep breath I closed my eyes and balled my fists – flexing all the muscles in my arms and then relaxing as best I could. I could feel the adrenaline pumping through my veins, the rush I felt before each time, especially when I was about to use this much. I called it up, my eyes flashed black. I concentrated on Kasey, I hoped she was somewhere stationary, it would make it easier. All I could see in front of me was grey, liquid mist, with dark, almost black shapes shifting restlessly around me. I felt my way through, trying to recognise the figures – not by sight, but by sense. It was like in a dream, when you know that the figure you're talking to is a particular person, like your brother or sister, even if when you wake up you can't remember what the figure looked like, or what they were wearing. It's just a feeling, a fractured memory. I found her.

As soon as I latched on, her surroundings became clearer. She was lying in bed in a dark room. _Hmmm... tempting... focus Reid. What is she doing?_ She was looking at something in her hand. I moved closer. Pills – she was holding two white pills. Just as I'd realised what they were she put them in her mouth and swallowed them dry. I saw light reflected from outside – a tear was running down her cheek. She closed her eyes and curled up into a ball. I searched for any sign of Chase but I couldn't see, or feel one. I didn't know why she was crying, but it wasn't because of Chase – he was nowhere to be seen or felt, plus I was pretty sure that if he was harming Kasey, it wouldn't be by force feeding her drugs. I felt a pang of pain as I looked at Kasey one more time. Her face was completely emotionless bar the single path of the tear. Something was seriously wrong, but I'd have to deal with it after we'd sorted out this whole fucking Chase mess.

I snapped myself out of it and bent over slightly. Suddenly I felt the rush of pain I'd been expecting – it happened when I used too much, it was like I could feel myself aging, it was excruciating. Then it passed. I ran out to the car. 'What took you so long? I just felt Chase use again, we have to get to the hospital and talk to Caleb.'

'Yeah I felt it too, let's go.' I felt bad lying to Ty but I didn't have a choice – it would just stir more shit and we really didn't need that.

**The dance next chapter, and the probably the last chapter involving the movie. **

**Please review, they mean the world. Thanks for reading!**


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